Showing posts with label sandhurst. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sandhurst. Show all posts

Friday, April 10, 2009

Sweet Pensive Afternoon

I think this afternoon was extremely productive. I feel like going out to Flirty Walk and taking a walk and some pictures, or up to the Gray Ghost trail and doing the same. I had a serious talk and some help filtering my thoughts on certain aspects of my life and also my perception of myself. I was given some food for thought on relationships, and also on my self-development. I have started to open up some more. I was called bright today and told to talk more often and the hardest person to convince that I was bright would be myself. I still have doubts which I suppose supports this theory. I was also told - as a compliment - that I "would never be anyone's devoted wife." This sentence both made me laugh and struck me as true.

Yesterday, we practiced the one-rope bridge although a large percentage of the team wasn't there. We were going through Flirty Walk and going off the trail to practice our drill. We came to the cliff by the river and someone jokingly suggested we rappell. We had the rope and the caribigners though... let's say hypothetically we rappelled down the cliff one at a time. We kept every single safety mechanism in place that we'd had during training and we all went down at least once. At one point (again this is all hypothetically) someone said,

"I'm just trying to be the voice of reason..."
and was cut off by,
"Well I'm the voice of INFANTRY!"

Obviously, as someone else said, "Well... fun and safety always seem to be inversely related..." and I love how reason and infantry were set opposed to each other. The day, had this event occurred of course *cough cough*, was hilarious and wonderful and warm. Tomorrow is the Spring Fest and talking about the competition. I slept in for the run today, but I am trying to really defeat the cold I've had since Sunday. Hopefully that and all the liquids I've been consuming and the vitamins will be good enough to get me in tip top health for next Saturday. If anything, my missing a run today isn't going to determine my fitness by then anyway. Apparently the favored team this year suffered an injury to their primary girl so we have an even stronger chance of placing in the top 5 now. I don't really know, but everyone else is optimistic and if anything I am excited. During practice our SL brought up that the Sandhurst sign used to read, '88 Days' and now it's less than 8... Crazy, but I'm truly looking forward to it.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Late Night Quick Quip

Just felt like a quick update.

329 on the APFT, supermaxed it! 51 push-ups, 85 sit-ups, and a 14:15 2-mile run. I believe this is my best score on the APFT, although only by a couple of points. It still is some of my best performaces across the board. The best (or worst) part is that I felt like I could have done better if I'd been working on the events leading up to the APFT. I heard if we had been doing more speedwork on sandhurst we could have shaved like 20 seconds off our 2-mile run, and I know if I'd worked on my push-ups I could have done more. I guess that's why I feel good, because this is my best performance and I feel like I have more in me. Next year... I am aiming for a 340.

Also... no more D's in classes!!! All C's, B's, or A-. And after this next Physics WPR, and Portuguese WOPR, hopefully two solid A's. I am bringing myself back up. I am getting back on the horse. And other good things are happening too! My roommate passed the APFT with a 276 which to me is an AMAZING "IN YOUR FACE" to all the people who recommended to separate her. If anything I have more faith in my roomie who persisted in spite of meanness and despite not having the support of classmates who are apparently too myopic to look down their stuck-up noses to help her. No one can ever tell me that she can't perform under pressure, I've seen her keep her cool in the History Department (they are so strict) and has a 3.5 in spite of physical grades that keep her from possible 3.9 and 4.0 Even though her element is in the academic realm, she has such a gift with people, that I think she would be a valuable asset to the Army. I will be extremely pissed off if she were to be gone, because additionally, who would I room with? It wouldn't be the same, she is my confidante and practically my sister soldier.

I need to finish strong, I want to, I love the comradery of the company and the team, I didn't shoot as well as I could have today, but that's okay I just need to concentrate and probably adjust my sling and maybe a couple more clicks left. Nice thing we have another range tomorrow. I am still nervous about the competition, in a way that makes me feel like I have a bowling ball in my stomach, but I cannot be distracted, because there is on April 17th and 18th, the I.R. paper due, the Physics WPR II, and Sandhurst. Combined, they will be a monster to deal with. I am preparing for the attack now, even if only mentally for the time being. We're past the hump of the week now! Less than three weeks until Sandhurst!! It's overtime so to speak now. Wish me luck all!

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Running Till There's Nothing Left

Tonight is just one of those semi-lonely nights. With the roommate out at the library and no pressing academic requirements I know where I could go hang out, but I don't want to go there. It's difficult having a cadet ex-boyfriend. I decided to keep this to a minimum, discussing relationships at all, but on a night like tonight it's the just the elephant in the corner I'm trying to ignore. The problem is in the organization of my time. I just haven't been wanting to go to his room to hang out and I don't want him around my room because most of my friends think he is stand-offish and, well, he is. He's stand-offish and he monopolizes my attention and still acts like we're lovebirds, which is awkward for friends. My roommate has been around since the beginning of the relationship and so she takes it in stride whether he is hanging out, stopping by, or has that mopey look on his face that says I am mad at him. I don't like that this alienates my other friends though, and it's a major source of tension between him and I.

Yesterday we had a work out by one of the plebes on the team we call him 'Baumer' and he called his work-out the "Dirty Joe". One of his favorite phrases is "It's all for the Joes." and he is a very funny plebe. I am happy to be on the team and meet these good, strong individuals. It's eye-opening and every day I learn a little more and not just about military related stuff. I am finding a new and different niche here at West Point. I love my roommate, but our social circles are mostly different, so I really appreciate Sandhurst for that reason. After the lift yesterday we went to EST the simulated shooting and we shot scenarios that were mostly fun except for the stress shoot which was really stressful for me because "Little Ben" was standing behind me telling me the wrong color to shoot at and distracting me in general and I was accidentally forgetting that in a stress shoot you face the target and go to the 'low and ready' position between targets. It was in good fun though, not malice and I enjoy EST. I also enjoy swimming which not everybody does. My biggest weakness (and I've never denied this) has been running.

Today we were running in gear and pushing our pace toward Lee Gate. One of my teammates was pushing me and said, "Come on [my name], we're not even a quarter of a way through." I felt horrible after that sentence. I know I shouldn't have, but I felt like doing something childish like throwing down my rifle and stopping running and just yelling, "Look, I'm not in good enough shape for you!" but I pushed until we got to the gate and told the SL (Squad Leader) I could push no more and my knee was tight. He told me to take an easy jog back. I felt... unsettled. I knew I could run further, but at that pace it would be impossible. So I ended up doing intervals back to the barracks. I also didn't go straight back. I ran and walked up to Washington Gate then jogged all the way down that hill to the cemetery. I alternately walked and jogged back to the corner of the Catholic Chapel hill and then I ran, walked, ran, walked, ran up the hill to the Cadet Chapel turn off and took the stairs down to cadet area and walked back to Pershing, my barracks. I knew it wasn't the same work-out as the team, but I felt a little better about myself. I am still going to ask ortho to check out my knee and I am still going to ask the SL to give me a work-out I can do in addition to the scheduled work-outs. I was hesitant about the last thing, but I obviously lack the core running muscles that everyone else seems to have. It's true that I've never done long distance running at faster than a 7:30 per mile pace, and wrestling is less endurance running than short bursts of energy combined with generally high cardio endurance. This is light endurance though and this is basically strength running with the gear and the rifle.

It's not about being the one competing on game day to me, it's about giving the SL the best I've got and about being at least a viable option. I want to be a good alternate. I want them to know that if push came to shove they could rely on me to step up and on a good day perform for them. I want to be a valuable member of the team and I want to be able to run five miles in gear for the team and maybe one day for my platoon. I want to be capable of this, not only ask people to do this for me.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Dodged a Bullet... Again

Last night is definitely a story for today. The scenario is me sitting on my bed studying for my International Relations Written Partial Review (IR WPR) which is going to be two essays on two articles. At about fifteen past nine I fall asleep. A quarter hour passes...
Enter stage left my platoon sergeant (PSG)

PSG: Hey [my name] are you awake?
ME: *indistinct grunt*
PSG: Oh good because you know you're plebe is going up for Brigade SOQ tomorrow morning right?
ME: *indistinct grunt*

At this point, I'm not even paying attention because of course I know that my direct subordinate and only leadership responsibility a plebe (freshman) with prior military service experience is going before the Brigade Soldier of the Quarter (SOQ) board tomorrow. I drifted off back into sleep only slightly hearing my PSG ramble on about having "sooo much to do tonight including a problem set and..." I just fell asleep. Then I had this crazy dream sequence where I went down the hall and asked my plebe if he was ready for the board and that I went downstairs and was in another building after taps. All of this was so dreamy and almost none of it happened. I never set my alarm and didn't even think it had really happened.
The next morning my PSG asked me how the board went for my plebe. I gave a blank stare,

"What? The board? Oh I don't know, I haven't asked him yet."

I swear my PSG's eye twitched, but all my PSG said was that it was okay "it happens". As if to throw gasoline on a fire I found out at lunch that my plebe had actually slept through the board. Then I heard word at lunch that the blame was being shifted to me in a sneaky attempt to keep someone else's military performance squeaky clean. I was defensive and on edge, and asked for a little advice. I clearly didn't remember being told to be there or to get my plebe in the morning. I spent the better part of the day wondering about it since a couple other people had brought it up.

In the afternoon today after PMEE (called PME squared, and I don't even remember this acronym but it usually means a BORING class in the free part of our afternoon) I got to meet the sponsor of the other girl on the company sandhurst team. She was a '93 grad of West Point and lots of fun. She helped a little with the cake, but just a couple tips with the frosting and flouring the pan which I had already greased. The cake was cute, dense and perfect! It was for loosing a bet to a guy in my company, but I had loads of fun making it when I brought it back to the barracks I couldn't resist telling the people giving me funny looks,
"Yeah, I baked this cake.... for a man."
It's sort of a running joke here due to a speaker last year who made a joke in which he said, "Woman, go bake me a pie." Well here I had an actually baked cake. When I brought it to his room I'm pretty sure if he'd been gone for longer than 20 minutes his roommates would have devoured half of it without him. Everyone was floored I had actually done it because it's one thing to 'bet' you're going to bake a cake, and another thing to give up your afternoon go out of your way to meet someone with an oven and get the ingredients and really bake a cake. It was a very yummy cake by the way, but extremely simple. See, the my sponsor offered to pick up the ingredients too and I made sure I picked a recipe with plain ingredients most of which I knew she would have around the house. Just as as starter recipe and since I wasn't sure if I'd get the opportunity to go to the commissary with her.

It was much fun and she even had decaffeinated Pepsi around the house because it's all her husband drinks and since I gave up caffeine for lent, it was awesome!

I then had practice which to be quite honest was a 'suck-fest' today. We put our gear on and went downstairs to the basement weight room. I chose a 35-lbs plate for the squats, the bent-over row, back and forths, etc. Then our fearless squad leader got us to scramble into our gear and run upstairs. I also had to get the rope ruck and so after snapping on my Advanced Combat Helmet (ACH) I went to my room and pulled my gas mask out of the bottom along with pulling the E-tool out of its pocket too. Theeen we starting running down Thayer Road towards Thayer Gate and though I really put my heart into it I began to fall back. Unfortunately one of the much more fit members of the team had an eye on me today and fell back preemptively to push me up to the group. I was both embarrassed and propelled forward at the same time. Fortunately less than a mile into it we paused to go over the 8 steps to evaluate a casualty then we pushed up the hill to michie stadium. I required a lot of help this time, but I definitely pushed hard. The same person who had been watchful earlier was close by a second time and definitely helped push me up the hill although the squad leader had me grab his Load Carrying Vest (LCV) too. I had multiple help, but I still managed to push an awful lot by myself given we were definitely going faster than my pace even without gear. Another pause to recite the 9-Line Med-Evac Radio Call and we were off again. At the beginning of the steep S.O.B. that is the bottom of the PX hill another super fit member of the team began to push me, but I was hurting at this point. Once again the person who had fallen back to help me the previous two times was suddenly next to me again pushing me literally and verbally. When I couldn't help but slow down some more he said,

"Come on, I'm pushing all you're weight right now."
To which I curtly replied, "I get it!"

And immediately tried to alleviate the pressure. Sure, I didn't get all my weight off his hand, but I was trying and trying. I felt like my lower back and legs were going to disintegrate or seize up or spontaneously combust. I honestly wanted to throw myself on the side of the sidewalk and just lay there and vocalize the pain I felt in my muscles. Eventually we switched to a quick walk then we ran a little more and in a brief moment of walking the squad leader asked how I was doing, in particular about my knee and I was honest that it was feeling tight. That was more than likely just due to the extra weight of gear and the pounding of ramming up the hills after exerting our muscles. Nonetheless, I had knee problems earlier this school year and it was better to let him know than to be stupid. I had already done two runs in times difficult for me, and I had done two hills (true with help, but I was obviously waning in my strength) and there was no point in destroying myself for practice.

Along the way the same guy who helped me those three times also instructed me in how to hold my rifle while running and told me to control my breathing because I would "wear myself out long before I had to." I was sucking down air like a freight train...

The last thing the team did was buddy carries up the hill past Delafield Pond (Yes, ANOTHER hill, like I said there are so many f-ing hills around here) And I helped where I could but did not carry anyone because it would have been more stress to my knee I didn't need. I offered to carry two teammates' dummy rifles (called rubber ducks) and one of the dummy rifles of the 'casualties' they had to carry. Along the way "M'n'N" asked me to help him for a moment with the multiple rifles he carried and I jogged over and started to take rifles from him, then he said,

"Or you could just take my place for a little bit."
I shook my head and said,
"Sorry, squad leader told me not to carry anybody."

He gave me this annoyed look and dropped the rest of the rifles at my feet. I stooped to pick them up, but I didn't forget about it. When we got to the top he approached me and asked me to help him unclip the rifle on his back to which I replied and didn't care how snooty I may have sounded,

"No. You threw two rifles at me down there."

He apologized unconvincingly and I made some excuse up about being unable to see how it was clipped in and other people removed it. M'n'N was apparently having a bad day but I was still irritated.

The day ended earlier but I've been trying to finish my Econ Problem Set and study for Statistics, the latter of which didn't happen at all tonight. Oh well, it will pretty straight-forward and I don't care for that class much anyway. A lot happened today, it was a full day in a make you tired kind of way.